By Vera

I don’t know if there was a specific moment of my life that had changed me forever… There was? I guess every moment of my life contributes to define my self… or to define the image that others have about me or to the one I built about myself.

I remember when I was four years old and I was playing at my grandparent’s. They had chickens and I decided to give them corn… I gave it with my own hand and I of course… they bit me. Did it contribute to define me? I don’t think so… But I am afraid of birds… and I always will be…

Another moment I remember was when I decided to stop of being a well-behaved girl with good marks and with a maybe brilliant career waiting for me… It is stupid isn’t it? Well… that’s how it sounds to me now… but that’s how I used to see things… and how others used to see me… So I gave it up and I decided to live real. I left my country, the books, the intellectual conversations, the comfort of having everything and everyone and I went away. I went to work in bars, pubs, shops… I went to clean floors and talk about ice creams, about cocktails, about how to fold a jumper in the best way… I felt proud! I felt I was surviving, I felt I was alive. But as I was becoming better folding jumpers I started missing the one I used to be, the one who used to define me, the one who used to talk about other things than making a good coffee and folding jumpers. I had been redefined, or I redefined myself. I wasn’t anymore this smart girl who used to have interesting chats about philosophy, aesthetics and arts. Now I was this cool girl who wanted to have fun, talk about silly stuff and, who was becoming each day better at folding jumpers. So I stopped being proud! And now?  If I redefined myself how could I re-redefine myself?  How could I stop others to look at my redefined image? Well… I did it… or I didn’t. I’m not sure.